No, it's not like that.

So . . . it's a Friday night, the beginning of a long weekend, and what am I doing? I am sitting on my bed in a darkened hotel room, alone, mechanically eating popcorn, my eyes glued to a glowing screen where a DVD plays; a DVD with strange, trancelike music and very little dialogue. It's a yoga instructional video. I'm just sitting here, though. So why am I watching yoga? I guess I watch yoga for the same reasons a lot of people watch porn. I was thinking about doing it, but I can't, so I'll watch someone else do it. (No, I do not get some thrill out of watching yoga. I'm not that freaky.) I'm sure it would be highly beneficial if I actually DID do it . . . but I'm not that flexible. This woman can stand up, keep her feet flat and legs straight, and put her elbows on the ground. It's not even like she's a juvenile Asian girl; she's white, blond, and at least 48, if not 54. Eeew . . . this is not even right. If people were MEANT to bend like that, I'd be able to do it. (That's pretty much my standard answer for all of my disabilities. People were not meant to do it. It's above and beyond, and I am not that motivated. Just plain human, that's what I am.) I think she just dislocated her hip. At least, if MY hip did that, it would be dislocated. AHHH! I might not be able to handle this. I just watched a war movie (BAT-21; it has Danny Glover and Gene Hackman, and it's about the Air Force. It wasn't that good, but YAY! DANNY GLOVER!!!) and that was WAY easier to stomach---blowing up Charlie, limbs and blood---than watching this woman contort herself in ways people aren't meant to go. Why are things like yoga and pilates so popular? Crazy faddish fadders . . .